We set ourselves up to impossibilities. Earlier this year, I decided to update this journal everyday. This is a simple task of discipline. And although I've said this in the past, I never committed to it until the last few months.
But...but, I fell off the wagon, as per course. With all that pent up will power and positive 80's self talk shit, I failed at keeping my word.
But...but why? The simple answer is that it was never THE PRIORITY. As soon as I was forced on some writing deadline for bigger projects (ie: feature film) and an editing responsibility that was exciting (YOUNG BUCK - The Video), I no longer felt the obligation to hold myself accountable. Same goes for my beard, haircuts, and keeping mad muscles.
The bigger forces overtook the smaller. This is weak sauce 101. I could have done both and all. But, I choose the less stressful route. The route that left me some metaphorical jerk-off downtime.
And, for my own soul, that works better. Because sometimes a motherfucker just has to sit down in front of the TV, regardless of the pretentious post-academics or over achieving ass-hats that add shame to the game.
Do what works. As long as you work. Your flow triumphs checklists and made up discipline. But try not to become a weed smoking, video game choking, fast food hoarding, eternal neophyte. And, even if you do, make sure you go all out, with breaks in-between. Also, call your mother once a week.